7 Steps to Stay Steady in Tough Conversations

As a couples therapist, I help people learn to hold steady in very difficult conversations with their partner. I know this is not easy, because I had to learn it myself. My spouse, who is much more even-tempered than I, and has been an amazing and challenging teacher for me, particularly when it comes to […]

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Better than “Better Half”

Differentiation of self is the key to a strong relationship.

Have you ever heard the phrase “better half”? Our culture is rife with this idea–that two partners are two halves of a whole. Lovers tell one another “you complete me.” In marriage ceremonies, we talk about two becoming one. Even the term “soulmate” refers to an Ancient Greek idea that true lovers were two halves […]

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Nuances of Consent: The Therapist’s Side

Recently, I wrote a blog post about consent, and discussed how the most common kinds of consent violations are much more subtle and insidious than those we see discussed in the media. Today I want to discuss a related question: as a therapist, how might you see this showing up in your therapy room, and […]

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