What Happens When Sex Falls Flat?

Couple fighting

Let’s start by imagining a common scenario, one that plays out every day in bedrooms around the world. A couple—let’s call them Laurie and Mark—are having a fun, sexy encounter, and Mark begins to lose his erection. Mark feels embarrassed by his loss of erection. He’s ashamed and feels sure that Laurie is judging him, […]

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Desire Discrepancy Lesson #2: Look for the Blocks

I’m continuing my series on desire discrepancy this week. If you missed last week’s post on normalizing variation, you can find it here. What do you do if you’re seeing a couple with a big desire discrepancy, their marriage is on the rocks, and you recognize that you can’t wave a magic wand and make […]

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Desire Discrepancy Lesson #1: Normalize Variation

Last week, I wrote about why desire discrepancy can be such a challenging issue for couples therapists to work with. If you missed last week’s post, you can read it here. If you think about it, it’s not all that surprising that desire discrepancies are common. People vary widely from one another in preferences, desires, […]

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