It’s just a fact that there aren’t enough LGBTQ therapists to work with all the LGBTQ clients out there. Nor are there nearly enough polyam therapists to work with all the polyam clients, or enough kinky therapists to work with all the kinky clients. The same goes for every other marginalized population.
The good news is that you don’t need to be a member of a marginalized population in order to work effectively with members of that population. You just need to be warm and compassionate, willing to listen and learn, and open to challenging some of your ingrained assumptions.
Here’s my advice for building a practice that embraces sexual diversity:
- Invest in continuing education about diverse sexualities (LGBTQ people, asexuality, gender diversity, polyamory and other consensual non-monogamies, kink, etc.) Very likely you have a license with continuing education requirements; why not focus some of your continuing ed on expanding the range of populations you’re prepared to work with?
- Use inclusive language on your website and your online profiles. Your potential clients pay attention to the language you use. They’re on the lookout for signs that you may or may not be prepared to work with them, and this is a great and easy way to signal that you are. For instance, it might benefit you to avoid using language that assumes your potential clients are heterosexual and in monogamous relationships.
- Use inclusive language on your intake forms. For instance, on my forms, I have a write-in line for gender, and another for pronouns, so my clients don’t have to select from limited options or take on a label they don’t choose for themselves.
- Be open about the fact that you’re still learning. Your clients don’t need you to be perfect, they just need you to be warm, compassionate, and open to learning and feedback. If you make a mistake, make a good repair. Let your clients know you welcome an honest conversation about their experience of working with you. If you use incorrect pronouns, and they correct you, respond warmly, with kindness and gratitude. If they give you any kind of feedback at all, take it seriously and honor it as a demonstration of differentiation of self. It is not easy to speak up in this type of situation. Your client is awesome for pushing back, and you should do all you can to make it easy for them to give you honest feedback.
The world needs more therapists who are competent and confident working with marginalized groups of all kinds. This advice focuses on people who are marginalized on the basis of sexuality, but it holds true for any marginalized group. There are clients out there who need you, and you have an opportunity to make a big difference. Go for it!