As you probably know by now, I have two areas of specialty as a therapist: sex therapy and couple therapy. What you may not know is that while I am a specialist in sex therapy, I think only about 20% of the clients who see me actually need a specialist. What the other 80% actually needs is a highly competent therapist who is really comfortable talking about sex when it comes up, and has some tools and techniques for helping with sex issues as well as accurate information about sex and sexuality.
Here’s the problem: Most people don’t have access to accurate information about sex, let alone the comfort and skill to share it therapeutically. And that’s what I want to change.
This isn’t rocket science. It’s sex. Something most people have from time to time, and something that to some people, at least, is extremely important and meaningful. Whether a person has sex, wants sex, doesn’t want sex, doesn’t have sex, is confused about sex, has identity issues around sex, has sex behaviors they want to change or never want to change, is raising children who might benefit from talk about sex, wants to have better sexual function, gets hurt feelings when sex doesn’t go according to plan, or a million other things…sex is something that affects everyone at one time or another in their lives.
Maybe you think sex is private. Sex talk is confidential. Sex can be complicated. There are thorny, tangled relational issues about sex. Sure, ok, but even if all of the above are true for you, therapy could be a great place to discuss sex. Private. Confidential. Personally tailored, client centered.
So let’s change this together! Let’s change how the therapy world sees sex.
Imagine a world in which clients had every reason to think their therapist would be comfortable and competent to help if they brought up any issue in therapy—even a sex issue.
Imagine a world in which every therapist felt solid talking about sex in the regular course of therapy. Comfortable, confident, competent, able to help the 80% of sex-issue clients who don’t really need a specialist.
How much more could we help our clients, how much more effective could our work be, in such a world?