Category: Uncategorized

The Three Aspects of Differentiation of Self: Part One

This is the first post in a three-part series on differentiation of self.  You may have noticed that I write and speak about differentiation often. That’s I believe differentiation is the bedrock of any healthy relationship, as well as a fundamental cornerstone of happiness in general.  As a therapist, fully understanding the various aspects of […]

What Creates Change?

In my last post, I wrote about why individually-motivated goals for change are the difference between relational therapy that works and relational therapy that doesn’t. Relational therapy requires you to take a deep and possibly uncomfortable look at yourself—rather than simply hoping your partner will do all the changing. You can read it here.  This […]

Rediscovering Sex in a Mixed-Desire Partnership

In last week’s post, I wrote about the common advice that partners experiencing a desire discrepancy “just do it,” and the way that can backfire. I argued that willingness (not desire) is the key ingredient for partners seeking to rediscover their sexual connection. However, I also acknowledged that many couples feeling awkward and uncertain when […]

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