Blog

Nuances of Consent: The Therapist’s Side

Recently, I wrote a blog post about consent, and discussed how the most common kinds of consent violations are much more subtle and insidious than those we see discussed in the media. Today I want to discuss a related question: as a therapist, how might you see this showing up in your therapy room, and […]

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7 Tips for Getting Creative: A Sex Therapist’s Guide to Trying New Things

Young couple kissing under the covers

Learn about how you get turned on–and off. All too often we think about arousal as if it’s an off-on switch–you’re either turned on or you’re not. In reality, research shows that it’s more like an accelerator and a brake. Doing things that turn you on is like pushing the accelerator. No matter how hard […]

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All Levels of Desire Are Normal

Couple fighting

When therapists work with desire discrepancy, they sometimes fall into a counterproductive trap–identifying one partner as “high” or “low” desire, and trying to “fix” that partner’s desire level. “High desire” and “low desire” are comparative terms. What standard are you comparing against? Is there such a thing as “normal desire” or “abnormal desire”? I say […]

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